Fun
Republican and Democrat Differences
A Republican and a Democrat were walking down the street when they came to a homeless person. The Republican gave the homeless person his business card and told him to come to his business for a job. He then took twenty dollars out of his pocket and gave it to the homeless person.The Democrat was very impressed, and when they came to another homeless person, he decided to help. He walked over to the homeless person and gave him directions to the welfare office. He then reached into the Republican's pocket and gave him fifty dollars.
Osama in Paradise
After his death, Osama bin Laden went to paradise. He was greeted by George Washington, who slapped him across the face and yelled angrily, "How dare you attack the nation I helped conceive!" Then Patrick Henry punched Osama in the nose and James Madison kicked him in the groin. Bin Laden was subjected to similar beatings from John Randolph, James Monroe, Thomas Jefferson and 66 other early Americans. As he writhed in pain on the ground, an angel appeared. Bin Laden groaned, "This is not what I was promised!" The angel replied, "I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you! What did you think I said?"
Oil Shortage
A lot of folks can't understand how the U.S. came to have an oil shortage. The simple answer is that nobody bothered to check the oil… They didn't know they were getting low... The reason for this is purely geographical. All the oil is in Alaska, Oklahoma, Texas, Louisiana, Wyoming… All the dipsticks are in Washington, D.C.